Tuesday, September 18, 2012

The Bitter with the Sweet

I do believe the most bittersweet moment for a momma is releasing her children: the pride that comes with knowing that if you did your job right, they are equipped and prepared to live a life abundant on their own vs. the the emotion of the inexplicable bond of having carried that child inside of you with the utmost care for 9 months and having spent the next 18 years of your married life kid-focused, all of a sudden to find that your job is done and even though you did it right and they are ready to fly, there's a thread of that apron string knotted securely to your heart.

But when that time comes, you realize you can't go where they are going...you've guided their steps to help them walk the path that God desires for them, guarding against what we want, and resting in the knowledge that it's not our path...Such a bittersweet moment! 

One of my mentors, Jean Stockdale, used to say at some point during the semester of Moms, "Our goal is to work ourselves out of our job."

It is at some point of this goal-reviewing during said bittersweet moment that panic hits.  There is that instant realization that during his/her entire 18-year-span, we didn't keep up with that list of Things To Do To Prepare Child To Fly Nest!!!  And we begin racing back through our mental tapes, and jumping over to that list, mentally checking off items...all the while doubting that this mental list is even complete in all areas!! 

This is reminiscent to walking into the classroom to find out today is the day you will be teste on all you've been studying during the year. 

yeah.  that's the feeling.

So.  even in this bittersweet moment, my cup overflows not only with the joy of seeing this child blossom into her own, but also with the sadness of days gone by that I can, with all confidence, say that I cherished every one!


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